To All the Guys Who Have asked me out...

To those customers who always try to hit on me…

I’m not amused… I’m not flattered… I don’t think it’s funny or cute… And I just really don’t appreciate it.  Call me crazy for being annoyed that guys are asking me out, but here is why.

When a complete stranger starts flirting with me, I can’t help but think… This dude doesn’t even know me…  All he knows is what I look like and that I work at Starbucks.

Now, if it was a regular customer that I had formed a relationship with, it may be a different story.  But when a complete stranger asks me out, it makes me very upset.  I know that the guy knows nothing about my personality, my character, or my life!  That leads me to believe that he is only attracted to me for my physical appearance.  Although… I’m not sure what they see in me when I’m running around making 16 Frappuccino’s in our Summer rush with a Frapp Roast fake tan, mocha tattoos, caramel stuck to my apron, hair flying out of my hat, and my oh so cute, all-black uniform…

But in all seriousness, I realize that many people start a relationship based on the initial attraction they have for one another.  But most people become friends and start “talking” (as the kids these days say) before starting to date.  This is how a relationship should be! You need to get to know each other. 

My fiancé, David, and I have known each other for three years.  And we certainly did not jump into a relationship.  We have been reading The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller and I will share a few quotes with you from this book…

“Your spouse has got to be your best friend… or you won’t have a strong, rich marriage that endures and that makes you both vastly better persons for having been in it” (Keller 136).

So many people today think about who they want to date and have so many physical expectations, but fail to see what is really important.

Do you have a strong friendship?

Do you have the same values and beliefs?

Do you enjoy spending time together?

Are you able to be honest with each other?

Can you be yourself around each other?

Do you support each other in your interests?

Are you committed to each other?

Without those things, a relationship would be worthless.  So tell me why would I accept an offer to go on a date with a stranger, that I haven’t spoken to in my life, to see if we were a good match to start a relationship? No way!  Guys, get to know the person first, become friends and then, if it’s the Lord’s will, a relationship may begin.

It’s actually quite offensive to me that a guy would even have the guts to ask me out solely based on my looks.  Let me tell you, you are so much more than your looks! If someone thinks they are going to get a date just by giving you a “compliment” by flirting with you without getting to know anything about YOU, they need to think again!

Relationships are not easy.  They are a lot of work.  They take sacrifice, commitment, and compromise.  They are not something a person should decide to jump into seconds after looking at someone.

I believe that individuals should start dating relationships in order to decide if they should get married.  Not just to have fun, or have someone to hang out with or look cute with.  Dating is serious and should be taken seriously. 

Marriage is an even greater commitment.  “Marriage has… the kind of power to set the course of your whole life.  It has that kind of power because it was instituted by God” (Keller 144).

For Christians, “here’s what it means to fall in love.  It is to look at another person and get a glimpse of the person God is creating, and to say, “I see who God is making you and it excites me!  I want to be part of that.  I want to partner with you and God in the journey you are taking to his throne” (Keller 132).

That is a huge responsibility and such an honor.

Think about these things next time you think about taking someone up on the offer to go out just because of a simple compliment about your appearance.  And before you flirt with someone just because you think they are cute.  Don’t make God’s perfect design for love and relationships look like any less.  Live to honor and glorify His name by blessing others with kindness and respect.

Lots of Love,

Dani xoxo

Engagement Story

I Said YES!!!

I never imagined that I would be engaged to be married at 19 years old.  I’ve always wanted to get married young, but never thought that would be before I was 23.  I had no idea that getting a job at Starbucks would lead me to meet my love.  I definitely never imagined that just going out one day after work would result in a relationship that will last a lifetime.  I am so thankful that God planned out our love story so perfectly and is continuing to write it.  Here is our engagement story! 

Earlier that week, David told me he took the day off from work that Thursday so we could finally have a date.  (We hadn’t had a date in several weeks) So I was super excited!  I had a feeling that engagement would be coming soon, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up.

On Thursday, July 21 I woke up bright and early to get ready and make my makeup look really pretty.  Even if we weren’t going to get engaged this day, I knew there would be plenty of photo   (girls, you understand) Anyway, then I drove to pick David up from the car shop while he got something fixed on his car.  How romantic. Haha! Then we had to pick up my new glasses from the store.  I know off to a great start.  Oh, and to top it all off I had a killer headache and I was super dizzy! But that didn’t stop us from having a great day.

After we ran all of our errands we headed to Botanical Gardens for our date.  We went inside and used the restroom and started looking at the pictures on the walls.  During this time, David’s phone was blowing up!  I didn’t say anything, but I was on the lookout for anything suspicious.  We then went outside and started walking all around the gardens.  We love taking walks outside and Botanical Gardens is probably our favorite place to do this.  It was so hot that we had to keep taking breaks and finding shady benches to rest on.  The gardens were so pretty and they even had a butterfly house where we went inside and were surrounded by hundreds of butterflies.  After a few hours, we headed back to the car to get our lunch.  At this point I had completely given up on the idea that we would be getting engaged that day, which was fine because we enjoyed just getting to spend time together.

When we got to the car for our lunch, I started to get in because I thought we were leaving.  David told me not to get in the car because we were going to eat there.  I was surprised!  I had no idea.  So we get our lunch and walk up to the big hill where we love to sit and watch the airplanes take off and land.  When we get up there, David starts setting up a phone tripod to put his phone on so we can take a picture.  He told me to sit in front of the phone and he was going to try out this new camera clicker he got.  It was supposed to work where he clicked the button and the phone took a picture.

So he got everything set up and then he comes to sit next to me.  We smile as he tries to click the button with the clicker, but it isn’t working.  I try to press the button too, and it just wouldn’t click.  Still having my headache, I look away and rest my head while he tries to figure it out.  I was getting annoyed!  Once David is done messing with it, I look back at him and he says “what is this?”  I look down and my mouth drops wide open! I couldn’t even believe what I was seeing! A gorgeous ring in his hand!  I screamed and screamed some more.  He got on one knee and proposed.  Of course I said yes!

This ring was his grandmother’s ring who passed when David was a young boy.  I feel so honored and blessed that he chose to give this ring to me.

I asked him right afterwards, “Do my parents know? Does everybody know?”  This was very important to me.  He not only asked my parents for their blessing, but he told my entire family and his entire family when he was planning to propose.

We were just so so happy!  We finished up our lunch while we smiled and laughed talking about how real this is.  We are actually getting MARRIED!!!!

Crazy side note.  When I was in high school, before David and I started dating, I had to write a futuristic memoir.  This was something that could happen in the future, but hadn’t happened yet.  I wrote about my dream proposal.  And guess where it took place?!  Botanical Gardens!!!  David had no idea!

We then left Botanical Gardens and went to visit our friends at a couple different Starbucks stores.   

Then we went to his grandparents’ house where they had decorated the house and we all got to celebrate and have cake and punch!  Something really cool happened while we were there.  His grandparents got us a card that had a scripture in it that has meant a lot to us throughout our relationship.

“Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens” James 1:17 NLT

David and I have studied this verse and all of James 1 in great depth.  This verse means so much to us.  Many times we will go down to the beach and look up at the stars and just marvel at the work of our God.  The fact that this scripture was in the card was amazing!

After that, we headed to my house.  David said that he promised my parents we would stop by.  So we got to my house and my mom had decorated with purple streamers and had a cake ready for us, and flowers on the table from my grandpa.  As soon as we walked in the door, my mom grabbed us both for a picture.  All of a sudden, my brother and sister popped out from the door right behind us yelling “Surprise!!! We’re here!”  This was the craziest surprise at all, they live 3-4 hours away and drove to me just to celebrate!

Later on we all went down to the beach and stayed outside to enjoy the beautiful night, when we saw the moon looking gorgeous as ever.  And it even had a tint of red like a blood moon.  This is so special to us because of the verse I explained earlier.  We know that God’s hand was in this throughout the day.

It was perfect!  David did everything that was important to me.  We were able to spend the day together and have a real date, he had my whole family involved, along with his whole family.  We have the whole thing on video and we have pictures from the entire day.

At the end of the day, it’s not about the perfection of the proposal.  It’s about the fact that we are going to get to spend the rest of our lives together.  We are committed to each other and we couldn’t be happier.  We are so blessed to have the support of our loved ones through this journey.  And we are so thankful that God has brought us together!

Now… Let the wedding planning begin!

Lots of Love,

Dani xoxo

Rest

Rest

We are all such busy people.  In today’s world as adults, we have so many responsibilities.  Family commitments, work, education, household responsibilities, and just the other things life throws at us that can be extremely overwhelming.  We have all experienced this.  Life is not always peaceful rainbows and butterflies.  It’s overwhelming and stressful at times.  It is so important that we learn to deal with this stress in a healthy way and not let the enemy overtake us!

Over the past several weeks, I have been extremely overwhelmed with the stresses of life.  It has gotten to the point where it has been affecting my overall mood and attitude.  That is not good!! We need to remember what is truly important and hold on to the true things God says about us that we can find in the Bible.

Once Christians understand that the Word of God is full of truth, they can apply that to their lives.  We know that God is always with us.  This truth brings us peace.  We know that God formed us and set us apart.  This truth will help us feel loved, even in our darkest times.  We know that because God is always for us, it does not matter who is against us.  This truth can empower us to keep living our lives to glorify God even when others put us down.  The truth that God gives us can bring us much confidence and joy.

On the other hand, this world offers us lies daily.  As Christians, we must be able to distinguish between the lies of this world, and the truth of God.  We are constantly being told lies like “you will never succeed”, “you are not good enough”, and “nobody likes you”; however when we look to the Bible, we see very opposite things.  We see that we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us (Philippians 4:13).  We see that we are blameless, spotless children of God in His sight (Philippians 2:15).  We see that nothing in this world could ever separate us from the love of God (Psalm 139).  His love is so great for us that we could never understand it.  We learn that God is always with us wherever we go.  When we are able to speak these truths into our lives, we will become empowered and more capable of spreading the love of God to everyone on Earth.

When you feel stressed or overwhelmed, look to your creator for rest.  He says, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Let me teach you because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light” (Matthew 11:28-30 NLT).

Find your rest in Him.  He is the only one that can bring you true peace and rest.  Anxiety, depression, and worry are real things.  They are very difficult to deal with.  But we serve a big and powerful God.  If you are experiencing these things, look to God to find rest.  Sometimes it helps to just unplug from everything and take a break.  Read your Bible- get to know the true character of God.  Spend time listening to soft worship music and just soaking in the presence of God.  Talk to Him-pray.  God will always listen.  Write in a journal.  Just take a break and rest.

Find your identity in who God says you are.  Not what anyone else says.  Read your Bible.  Learn these things.  Ask God these questions and wait for Him to respond.  If you seek the Lord, He will give you everything you need.  He cares for you.  He loves you more than you could ever imagine.  Cling to that love.

A friend of mine shared this saying with me a few years ago about rest: “Sometimes life feels like running on ice.  You get further sitting on your butt and sliding than running.”  This is so true.  Sometimes we just need to take a break and trust that God is holding us in His hands.  He is already at the solution of our situation.  We think it will never work out, but God is already there.  Take some time to spend with just you and God.  He treasures this time… what an amazing thing that the creator of the universe desires to spend time with YOU! Wow!  We serve an incredible God!

Lots of love,

Dani xoxo