Why Wait?

Today I’m going to be talking about something that’s been on my heart for a while now.  Why wait to have sex until you’re married?  OH YES… that’s right.  I went there!  This is a very controversial topic especially in today’s society.  I am simply going to share with you what I believe and why I believe it.  I respect the fact that each person is entitled to their own opinions and beliefs.  If you would like to continue, please do read and I’d love to hear what you think!

First and foremost, the reason I want to wait until marriage to have sex is because I believe that God created sex as a sacred intimate act that is to be shared between a husband and a wife.  God does not honor sex unless it is done in the confounds of marriage.

Sex was created to be a beautiful thing, but in today’s society, it is often looked down upon as a dirty activity.  Everywhere we look, sex is present.  It’s ridiculous!  On commercials, billboards, movies, everywhere we look… We are introducing the idea of sex to children at such a young age.  We are told that “everyone is having sex… it’s not that big of a deal!”  Well that is not the truth.  Most people do not understand the purpose of sex.  They don’t understand that God created it as a gift.  God wants us to enjoy it.  But He created it for a husband and a wife.  That is it.

Sex is the most intimate act that couple can share.  Why would anyone want to give a part of their body away to someone that isn’t going to stay with them?  I personally want to save myself for my husband.  I want him to have all of me.  You may KNOW that you are going to marry your s/o, but until you are actually MARRIED, you don’t truly KNOW that.

I believe that when a couple is dating, they should be focused on getting to know each other and making sure they are compatible.  When the physical aspect is introduced, many times the emotional side of the relationship is pushed to the side.  People then start to enjoy being with that person because they enjoy the physical aspect of the relationship rather than because they truly love the person.  I don’t want there to be any confusion there, so I am waiting until marriage to have sex.

As Christians, we are supposed to “go against the flow”.  It’s not always easy, but it is what is right.  God called us to be set apart.  Even when the world says something is okay, we must follow God’s will for our life.

You will also learn a lot about your partner when you discuss the topic of sex with them.  If they are not willing to wait, they are not worth it.  They should want to honor you.  And they should also want to honor God.

“Love is patient…” (1 Corinthians 13:4)

I am not saying that sex is bad.  It is not bad.  It is a wonderful thing.  But it is not something that people should take lightly.  It is serious.  It is a gift from God.  And it must be used in marriage only.

Ways to Stay Pure in a Relationship Until Marriage

Well I am no expert in this because I am not married yet, but here are some things my boyfriend and I have talked about and set in place to ensure that we save sex for marriage.

1.     Talk about it

You have to talk about it and discuss where each of you stand on the topic of sex in order to not do it!  If you avoid the issue, you will find yourselves caught up in the moment and not stop yourselves because you haven’t discussed it before.

2.     Make a Commitment

You must view this as a commitment that you as a couple make first to God and second to each other.  You are making a promise to God that you are going to honor Him with your body and save yourself for marriage.

3.     Set Boundaries

You must set up boundaries in your relationship if you are planning to wait to have sex.  There is not a standard set of rules that every couple should follow.  Each couple is different.  This is why it is important to discuss these things early on in a relationship, before things get intimate at all.  You must take this seriously and pray together to know what you as a couple can do to honor God in your relationship and avoid having sex before marriage.  (We waited five months to even hold hands! Every couple is different!)

4.     Pray

Pray together all the time!  You must keep God at the center of your relationship.  The Lord gives us strength.  Philippians 4:13 says “I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength”.  Did you know this verse is actually regarding the topic of contentment? We need to learn to be content with what we are given and in every season of life we are in.  It is hard to stay pure.  Nobody said it would be easy, but it is so worth it.

5.     Accountability

Have other people hold you accountable!  Another couple that has been in this situation and has been married.  Or even just another person that shares these beliefs with you.  Someone that you can be honest with that will truly hold you accountable.

I want to honor God in every aspect of my life.  The truth is, we do not NEED a person to bring us joy, comfort, protection, happiness, or affection.  We don’t need that.  That is why we have God.  God is our Heavenly Father that will bring us peace and joy and strength and protection and grace and healing and life.  He loves us more than any human being possibly could.  He created each and every one of us with a purpose.  We were created for intimacy with Him.  We were created to bring the Kingdom of Heaven to Earth—share the gospel with unbelievers.  We need to be unashamed of our decisions that we make to glorify God.  Sure, some people will laugh or tease you.  But who cares!  Really!  We as Christians must strive to be more like Jesus daily.  You are setting an example to the world how Christians should act.  Ask God how you can honor Him in this aspect of your life.  Honor God with your body; He will bless you for doing it.

“Run from sexual sin!  No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does.  For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.  Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God?  You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price.  So you must honor God with your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18-20)

“Give honor to marriage and remain faithful to one another in marriage” (Hebrews 13:4)

You are so LOVED!

Dani xoxox