To those customers who
always try to hit on me…
I’m not amused… I’m
not flattered… I don’t think it’s funny or cute… And I just really don’t
appreciate it. Call me crazy for being
annoyed that guys are asking me out, but here is why.
When a complete
stranger starts flirting with me, I can’t help but think… This dude doesn’t even know me…
All he knows is what I look like and that I work at Starbucks.
Now, if it was a
regular customer that I had formed a relationship with, it may be a different
story. But when a complete stranger asks
me out, it makes me very upset. I know
that the guy knows nothing about my personality, my character, or my life! That leads me to believe that he is only attracted
to me for my physical appearance. Although…
I’m not sure what they see in me when I’m running around making 16 Frappuccino’s
in our Summer rush with a Frapp Roast fake tan, mocha tattoos, caramel stuck to
my apron, hair flying out of my hat, and my oh so cute, all-black uniform…
But in all seriousness,
I realize that many people start a relationship based on the initial attraction
they have for one another. But most
people become friends and start “talking” (as the kids these days say) before
starting to date. This is how a relationship
should be! You need to get to know each other.
My fiancé, David, and I have known each other for three years. And we certainly did not jump into a relationship. We have been reading The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller and I will share
a few quotes with you from this book…
“Your spouse has got
to be your best friend… or you won’t have a strong, rich marriage that endures
and that makes you both vastly better persons for having been in it” (Keller
136).
So many people today think
about who they want to date and have so many physical expectations, but fail to
see what is really important.
Do you have a strong
friendship?
Do you have the same
values and beliefs?
Do you enjoy spending
time together?
Are you able to be
honest with each other?
Can you be yourself
around each other?
Do you support each
other in your interests?
Are you committed to
each other?
Without those things,
a relationship would be worthless. So
tell me why would I accept an offer to go on a date with a stranger, that I
haven’t spoken to in my life, to see if we were a good match to start a
relationship? No way! Guys, get to know
the person first, become friends and then, if it’s the Lord’s will, a
relationship may begin.
It’s actually quite
offensive to me that a guy would even have the guts to ask me out solely based
on my looks. Let me tell you, you are so
much more than your looks! If someone thinks they are going to get a date just
by giving you a “compliment” by flirting with you without getting to know
anything about YOU, they need to think again!
Relationships are not
easy. They are a lot of work. They take sacrifice, commitment, and
compromise. They are not something a
person should decide to jump into seconds after looking at someone.
I believe that
individuals should start dating relationships in order to decide if they should
get married. Not just to have fun, or
have someone to hang out with or look cute with. Dating is serious and should be taken
seriously.
Marriage is an even
greater commitment. “Marriage has… the
kind of power to set the course of your whole life. It has that kind of power because it was
instituted by God” (Keller 144).
For Christians, “here’s
what it means to fall in love. It is to
look at another person and get a glimpse of the person God is creating, and to
say, “I see who God is making you and it excites me! I want to be part of that. I want to partner with you and God in the
journey you are taking to his throne” (Keller 132).
That is a huge
responsibility and such an honor.
Think about these
things next time you think about taking someone up on the offer to go out just
because of a simple compliment about your appearance. And before you flirt with someone just
because you think they are cute. Don’t make
God’s perfect design for love and relationships look like any less. Live to honor and glorify His name by
blessing others with kindness and respect.
Lots of Love,
Dani
xoxo
