Why WAIT to DATE?

I am 18 years old and David is my first boyfriend ever.  Now this does not mean I never had the opportunity to date anyone.  I had a few guys ask me out, but turned them down. 

I am the girl that says I will not date until I am ready to find a potential husband. 

Why in the WORLD would I do that?! Well for many reasons…

1. I believe the sole purpose of dating is to find someone to marry.  A future spouse.  A husband.  A life partner. 

That is a BIG decision to make! And certainly not one that most middle or high school students are ready to make!  Dating is a serious matter!

2. Dating causes drama! Especially if you are still growing and maturing.
Guys, being in middle and high school is stressful enough! Why add a relationship on top of that that you need to invest in?

3. With dating comes heartache!  Dating is not always rainbows and butterflies.  In fact, it is HARD! You will have arguments.  Even if you are IN LOVE and PERFECT for each other.  It is healthy to have disagreements in relationships and talk through issues with your significant other.
I wanted to save myself from any heartache because I was not ready to date and work hard at making a relationship work as a middle or high school student.

4. There are so many other things that are important to focus on, especially when you are young. 

In middle and high school, it is important to focus on school.  If you are distracted by your girl/boyfriend, it is that much more difficult to do well in school. And that can have a great impact on your future! 

5. Temptation
There are already so many temptations presented to teens! Dating introduces a whole list of other temptations to the scene.  And it is difficult to date and not give in to temptations.  For me, I didn’t want to have to deal with this.

You may be thinking… Well it’s just fun to have a significant other to go out on dates with.

It may be fun.  Just go out with friends!  It is okay to be friends with people of the opposite sex and not date them!  Sure every relationship involves effort from both sides, but it is much less pressure when you are not in a romantic, dating relationship!

Dating is no joke!  It is not something that people should take lightly! It is meant to be a committed relationship between a man and a woman that are considering making each other their lifelong partner in marriage.

Well if I wait to date, will I ever find anyone?

YES! If it is God’s will for your life to be married, you will find your future spouse in the right timing.

How will I find someone if I’m not looking?

I believe that God has a plan and a will for each person in their life. 

Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you, says the LORD.  They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” (NLT)

If God’s will for your life includes you marrying someone, he will make a way for that to happen.  He has a plan! He knows His plans! He has GOOD plans for you! He is going to give you a FUTURE and HOPE! Trust Him!

Think about this… God, the one who created the Earth and everything in it.  The one who placed the stars in the sky and knows them by name.  The one who calms the sea.  The one who created YOU.  That ONE is the God of the universe and HE has control over your life.  He has plans for you.  I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t want to place my life and trust in the hands of anyone/anything other than my Heavenly Father!

God has a plan for you! And has had this plan for you since before you were even born!!!

Psalm 139:16 “You saw me before I was born.  Every day of my life was recorded in your book.  Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” (NLT)

Just think about that for a second.  Let that sink in!  That is crazy!

Well…. God doesn’t care about ME…?
YES. HE. DOES.
You are His daughter/ His son.  His creation.  He literally knit you together in your mother’s womb.  You are his masterpiece.  (Psalm 139:13-15) He created you with a purpose.  He loves you.  He wants the best for you.  He is your Daddy!
He cares about YOU.  He thinks about YOU.
“How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.  They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand!” Psalm 139:17-18

It makes me anxious… I don’t know if I will ever find the one!
Let me tell you dear friend…
God has this planned out.  He has had your life planned before you had even been born. 
Every. Single. Detail.  (Psalm 37:23)
That includes your future spouse. 
If you are seeking the Lord with all of your heart, He will provide for you.  (Matthew 6:33) He will lead you.  He will guide you. 
The best part is, you don’t have to have it all figured out! Because your creator has already written your story.  Your love story.  Trust Him.  Give it to God. 

Well if I don’t “put myself out there”, I’m never going to find anyone!
Says who?
I was not looking for anyone to date.  And the funny thing is I had known David for almost two years before we started dating. 
God will place the right person into your life in His perfect timing.
Or He may tell you to pursue that person.  Either way, He is in control.  You do not have to “look”.  Just seek the Lord.  Pray about it. 

If you feel called to do something (like take part in online dating or the like), do it.  But do not believe the lies this world tells you that you will not find anyone if you don’t “put yourself out there”.  God has a plan for you and I’m just sayin… If He created the heavens and the Earth and every living thing, and is omnipotent, omniscient, and omnipresent, I’m pretty sure He doesn’t need your “help” to find the one.  Again, I am not saying that you should just sit back and relax.  Keep seeking God.  Listen to Him.  Pay attention to what He is saying.  And OBEY!

I’m just nervous….

God tells us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7)
God will give you peace.  He will give you rest.  Talk to Him.  Tell Him what you are concerned about.  He is your comfort.  Your place of refuge.  Your Father.

Be patient.  God will carry His plans to completion in His perfect timing. (Philippians 1:6)

Do not be discouraged.  Do not stress.  Do not fear.  Enjoy every moment your life.  Whether you are single, or dating, or have been through this and are married.

Think about it this way…
Your future spouse exists.  They are alive right now.  You may even know them!
Pray for them.  Write a letter to them.
But guys, do not settle.  God has your spouse out there, and if you seek Him you will find.  Be at peace in knowing that God will present that person to you when the time is right.

Do not rush.  There is no reason to date just anyone, when God has THE one for you.  Use this time to press into God.  Press into the love of God.  He teaches us what true love is.  And the better founded you are in God, the better your future relationships will be.  Take advantage of this time.  Enjoy this precious life God has given you!

I would love to hear what you think about this! Whether you are single, dating, engaged, or married!  Should you wait to date? Did you wait to date?  Do you take dating this seriously (only purpose for marriage) or do you think it is okay to date just for fun?

Thank you all!

I’m looking forward to hearing what you think!

Blessings,

Dani xoxo